Author: Ali Collins

  • Making a Morning Schedule

    Making a Morning Schedule

    This post was originally written on August, 11th 2010 on my blog SFPSMom.com Check out my blog for more parenting tips.

    Making a Morning Schedule

    You are probably already working with a morning routine. I created one last year when my girls were in Pre-K. This year, though, I’ve asked my daughters to get involved in creating a written Morning Schedule. As my girls are getting older, I am seeing that they want to express their emerging sense of independence and sometimes resist following my routine. (The pre- pre- pre-teen years have begun!)

    Though it would be much easier for me to just do it myself, I decided to use the big transition to kindergarten as an opportunity to start teaching my girls a “big girl” skill of time management. Getting them involved in the process will have the added benefit of reducing resistance to mommy’s rules. This is the schedule they helped to create (See right.)

    Making a Morning Schedule

    Brainstorm Ideas

    Talk about the tasks we do each day to get ready for school, and wrote them down on sticky notes. I made it fun and silly by suggesting ridiculous tasks. Since they can’t read, I drew stick figure illustrations. If your child likes acting, you could also pretend to be a little kid, and your child can be the parent and give you advice on what to do.

    Talk about the Value of Time

    Group tasks into roughly 15 – 30 minute chunks (e.g. wash face, brush teeth, potty, could fit into a 15-minute chunk). Many children (and even teens) struggle to learn basic time management skills because they don’t fully understand the value of time. (e.g. how long is a minute, five minutes, an hour? What does it feel like? What types of activities fit into these time amounts?) 

    Create a Master Schedule

    Create a big grid to put our tasks into and explain how a schedule works and how much time you have. I used an old manila folder cut in half glued to an oversized piece of construction paper. (See our version above. If you have another good version please email me and I’ll upload it as well.)

    Add/rearrange tasks

    Decide how to order the tasks. Tell your child “time management” means “fitting the tasks you have to do into the time you have”. With your child, take the sticky notes and fit them into the schedule you created. Have fun by making some silly suggestions that obviously don’t work. For example, ask “Do you think you should brush your teeth, and then eat breakfast? Or the other way around?”. Ask  your child what he or she thinks makes the most sense and what his or her preferences are for the order of tasks (obviously within reason.) Explain how much time you think activities will realistically take and agree to keep working on the schedule until you get it right.

    Decorate

    Let your child decorate the schedule with stickers and glitter glue, or go online to find superheroes or favorite characters to print out and glue on the calendar. Post your Morning Schedule in a prominent place you can point to in the morning. It is also helpful if it is near a clock. That way, you can reinforce your child’s learning of both how to read time and also their awareness of the value of time (as mentioned above.)

    Celebrate! 

    If you’ve already got a reward system, find a way to fit your Morning Schedule into it. If you don’t already have something in place, I find stickers or stamps are a great reward unto themselves. Also, never underestimate the power of hugs, high-fives, and fist-bashes!

    Some other ideas to consider

    Make it a game 

    are a good strategy for slowpokes. You can play with a timer and make a game out of doing various tasks. Just make sure it’s FUN and doesn’t increase stress. If you can find a silly time (we have a frog) it can help.

    You can ask: “How long does it take to get dressed? brush our teeth? How long does a favorite episode of your show last?”

    Use Music

    Make a music playlist that goes along with some of your morning activities. Great songs to include are upbeat, like “At the Hop” or “Move It Move It” or those with lyrics that count down). Let them know that they should be getting shoes on by a certain song.

    Let them chose

    If your child likes to be independent, let them choose the order of activities in a section of your schedule each day. For example: brushing teeth, going potty, washing face, and brushing hair could all go in the category of “grooming”. Your child could do “grooming” at the same time each day, but pick a different order for each activity every time.

    Whatever strategies you choose, the most important move is to HAVE FUN with these ideas, and approach it as a process. Each and every family is different, and so our our kids! 

    On that note, I’d like to know what YOU are doing to help make morning routines go more smoothly. What are your ideas? What works for you? If you come up with a twist or adaptation you’d like to share, please post a comment, or email me a picture and I’ll post it to the blog!

    If you found this post informative, please share it with other families. Thank you!

    Related Reads:

    Checklists to Keep Your Family On Track – Use these FREE Printable Checklists to help getting to bed, in from school, and out the door in the morning!

  • Advice for Members of the Global Minority (aka: White Folks) During These Troubling Times

    If you’re a white person who cares about the global majority, there’s a good chance content on social media platforms will spark something in you. In fact, that’s the purpose: to get you enraged and engaged. You’ll probably feel compelled to take action—and that’s not a bad thing. But if you haven’t already done a lot of work unpacking the ways you’ve been indoctrinated into whiteness, it’s important to ensure your activism doesn’t cause more harm.

    Some advice on what NOT to do:

    Forgiveness isn’t yours to give.

    It’s not your job to soften criticism of MAGA folks who are just now seeing the error of their ways. Nor is it your job to counsel people who’ve been harmed to forgive the abuse they’ve suffered in order to “bring both sides together.” Forgiveness is not yours to give—those who caused harm have to do the work to earn it from the communities they’ve hurt.

    Don’t be a white savior.

    Just because you’re waking up to this reality doesn’t mean others haven’t been working on it for much longer. This is not your opportunity to become a white savior or start a new nonprofit. Doing so only colonizes the resistance and takes vital resources, attention, and energy from people with far more knowledge and experience. They have already analyzed the issues, the researched histories, and built communities invested in solving problems. Jumping in to lead a project on a subject you just recently learned about is classic white supremacist behavior.

    Enough with the Pussy Hats and Safety-Pins!

    Wearing jewelry or selling merch “for the cause” is capitalism, not community care. Stop colonizing the resistance. Real activism is about what you DO, not what you WEAR. Just stop.

    Advice on what to DO:

    Take a pause.

    Ask yourself why you need to respond immediately to a problem as old as time. What is happening in you that’s making you feel the need to react. Is the action you want to take truly supporting those being harmed, or does it just make you feel better? A notebook can be a really helpful tool for these kinds of reflection. (Be sure to check out solid resources for unpacking whiteness listed at the end of this article!)

    Look to folks who are already doing the work.

    Listen to and support the needs of Black and Native American organizers, low-income, disabled, and immigrant leaders of color, and queer and trans activists of color.

    Did you see the movie The Help? I didn’t. But that’s what you need to be now. Be. The. Help. You’re not the hero of this story.

    If your role in this movie was Driving Miss Daisy, you would be the driver, and no, you do not get to assume the role of “magical black Negro.” What I’m trying to say her is you are a side character—you don’t have a character arc or a prominent plot line.

    In fact, I take it back. You’re not even a side character. You’re behind the scenes. You’re the gaffer, the person in charge of lighting scenes. You’re the intern getting coffee. The production assistant taping down cables so the actors don’t trip. You are Kraft services, providing food.

    This might feel uninspiring because you grew up watching movies where Tom Cruise goes to Japan and becomes a better samurai than Japanese people who have trained their entire lives to be samurai. (Seriously?) You’re role is not meant to be inspiring—that’s the point.

    Some ideas…

    This actually not that hard, but for some reason, y’all seem to have a lot of trouble thinking of ways to help. I know some of you may be asking,

    “But if I’m not starting my own nonprofit or making ‘resist’ T-shirts on Etsy, what do I do?” — random white mom.

    Some ways to actually be helpful: provide rides, bring food, offer free childcare, donate professional services like research, graphic design, video editing, and website support. Offer to take meeting notes, make flyers, create surveys, write emails for newsletters, reserve venues, provide IT help, provide food, donate laptops and printers, or help get copies made. That’s how you support.

    Do you know someone who needs to read this article? Send to a friend!! Support our work by signing up for the newsletter. Better yet, become a subscriber and help fund our work!

    Are you a member of the global majority with advice to share? Please comment below!

  • “Stay-at-Home-Sons”,

    “Stay-at-Home-Sons”,

    The Mainstream media propaganda machine is in overdrive.

    by Ali Collins, | January 29, 2026

    A recent Washington Post article asks: Can you still be a real man if you live with your mom? In an article titled “Stay-at-home sons are here—and they’re not going anywhere,” author Shane O’Neill debates the merits of men moving back home. Apparently, this new phenom began after Jeopardy champ Brendan Liaw jokingly listed his profession as “stay-at-home-son,” and the moniker went viral.

    Full disclosure: I don’t love mainstream news. Too often, it’s clickbait for boomers about “kids these days.” This article proved even less insightful.

    The Masculinity Crisis

    The grand thesis: men are moving home, at a time when America is in the throes of a full-blown “masculinity crisis.”

    OK, I’m not a man… but is this REALLY what folks are worried about right now? (cough, cough… GREENLAND, MINNEAPOLIS, cough, cough… EPSTEIN…)

    Yet, somehow, national panic has shifted to men’s jawlines and the “male loneliness epidemic.” The fate of the American man apparently hangs in the balance—especially if he’s living in his childhood bedroom. [Insert: Marlboro Man sobbing into his pillow]

    At this point in the article, I was so annoyed that I had to keep going. As if reading my mind, the author explained this was a “nuanced” conversation. The author then explained that living with one’s parents well into adulthood is considered normal in many non-white cultures. As one interviewee, Che Durena, pointed out, media coverage of stay-at-home dads lacks cultural context. “That’s just called being Italian or Filipino or Indian.”

    What’s missing

    What stood out most was what the author didn’t talk about: Why this “trend” makes sense on multiple levels: 1) the pre-frontal cortex isn’t fully developed until well into one’s twenties; 2) American expectations of moving out at 18 defy human evolution; and 3) it’s fucking expensive! Crippling college debt, a flagging economy, and a constrained job market due to AI automation and the rise of gig”work make it impossible.

    Also lacking was any analysis of how “independence” and “self-sufficiency” are American man myths grounded in both patriarchy and capitalism. After WWII, ad men (and the US government) sold us the idea that real men buy houses, cars, and TVs (and don’t live with mom.) The resurgence of the MAGA movement is now challenging men to live up to standards that may have been doable in the 1950’s, yet are no longer attainable in today’s financial reality. 

    What this propaganda is really about.

    Angry white men were manipulated into voting a reality show felon into office. Their candidate won, and now the chickens are coming home to roost. As more and more Chads can’t afford to buy a condo or get out of college debt, it will inevitably become clearer that no matter how many trans athletes are banned from playing sports, the American Dream is still a pipe dream for most Americans.  The cost of eggs and healthcare continues to rise, and that uppity Black woman who ran for president is no longer in the picture.

    It’s no wonder there’s a masculinity crisis! 60% of white men voted for Trump, along with their pick-me Latino and Asian cousins (55% and 39% accordingly.) They bought the snake-oil ideology of “bootstraps” and “hard work”. One year later, with DEI dismantled and ICE deporting the competition, they are running out of scapegoats.

    There is only one person left to blame—themselves.

    Based on the myth of meritocracy, if you are still struggling despite America Being Great, it means: A.) You actually are a loser; B.) 92% of Black women were right. You were duped by a con artist who protects pedophiles. C.) All of the above. You are not only a loser; you are also an idiot. 

    (Hint: The answer is C.)

    As neither of these conclusions is palatable, mainstream media is pivoting to “stay-at-home-sons”. When immigrants were doing it, it was trashy. Now that white people are doing it’s classy! Prepare for more articles like this and others on “the joys of van life!” (aka: living in your car.)

    What I wish we were talking about.

    And honestly? As a mom, I’m thrilled if my kids stick around. In fact, I consider it a compliment. I have always believed that multi-generational living is more practical, ecological, and economical. After seeing multi-generational living elsewhere, the American obsession with kicking kids out at 18 also seems… kind of sad.

    Maybe, instead of obsessing over masculinity, we could talk about supporting each other—crazy, I know. Unfortunately, with newsrooms purging diverse voices, there will be no more Black, queer, disabled, feminist critiques of popular culture in mainstream media. Instead, enjoy more puff pieces on the “masculinity crisis” and “stay-at-home sons.” How else will the current regime distract the public from crushing debt, skyrocketing inflation, and a precipitous decline in the American quality of life?

    Last summer, I saw an article that seemed to encapsulate where many Americans now find themselves. “I finally achieved the American Dream,” the author wrote, “by moving to Europe.”

    What do you think? Tell me in the Comments below…

    (And if you’d like to start a conversation, consider submitting your thoughts for publication on this blog.)